As one door closes….

I am horrid at this blog, life, adult business I’ve come to realize. I suppose setting reminders and such to make sure I post will have to be my next step. I promise to also update the IG account with new pics.

As I am coming to the close of this year-long journey I have come to the realization that people actually need to empower themselves more. I was surprised at how many people follow me, watch the IG page and have started a journey of their own, this makes my heart full. With this in mind when my one year journey ends I plan to continue #datingmyself365 and bring you more things so stay tuned.

It’s not about being single or in a relationship, it is about getting back to the most important relationship in the world, the one you have with yourself. Sometimes we lose sight of our own wants, needs, desires and truths and the burdens of life are heaped on top of us. As this “door” gets ready to close, I am walking into one where I have more of an understanding of who Denika is and what I want to get out of this world and what I want to give back to it. Stay tuned as I will reveal and update on the 29th of September all of my new information.

Please also consider following my non-profit www.

Talk soon


Absence makes the heart grow fonder!

Yes I have been MIA since November, my apologies it was not intentional. While I was absent I discovered how what I started as a challenge to myself was helping others to redefine and challenge their own lives. It is truly humbling and keeps me in awe that I have any reach at all. All I can say is keep pushing and take everything one moment at a time.

So back to my absence, I was busy trying to finish another master’s degree and I have to say this MBA was and is still kicking my ass. My brain seems to have gotten lazy but I will not quit and I am happy to say that come August 5th I will be graduating. Next step is to go back and finish law school (pray for me). Also during this time I was getting my daughter ready to finish high school and start her college journey. that is another humbling experience I will go into at another time.

So updates, In January I officially finished my #consistentbaggagedrop120, that left me in a truly amazing place surrounded by people who not only cared for me but also those that can help influence my life. this journey to get to know Denika again and not the mother, daughter and other persons I have been for the last 18 and 1/2 years has set me on my ass at times. I have also been depressed, brought to tears and I am still standing.

The journey continues and I promise to have weekly if not daily updates on next steps, please see IG as I will update pictures there. Talk soon!


Real date…

Yes I said it. I do see the dates between myself and the gym, bookstore, movies and other places as real but it is nice to be asked to go for a meal with someone. The trouble is I keep blowing him off and I’m sure that he will eventually stop asking. So step one of jumping back on the horse is taking the first step. Wish me luck!

In other news I think I am ready to add yoga and a dance class to my work out regiment. Searching for the best compliments of the other.

Just living and trying to focus, adjust and make it through both of these journeys.

#datingmyself365 #consistentbaggagedrop120


I seem to be formulating my thoughts in seven day hauls. I feel so busy right now that I barely have moments to breathe. Dating my self is going well I am discovering new things, contemplating the changes of some old and tweak some of the others that are just me. Spicy, inpatient, smart, caring, loving, traveling me; I am sure I can think or others but I digress. I am a little of a month into my 120 day Consistent baggage drop and the dating myself journey and while it is filled with up hill battles I am ready to face them all head on and one step at a time.

I am not sure if the gym is my happy place but running and walking are, but I hate the cold so can someone suggest a happy medium as I need to tone these last thirty pounds.

Thats all for now, I will try to be more consistent but I have so much on my plate and I am learning to prioritize better, cause clearly I suck at it. Pics are still being uploaded on my IG page at least I am somewhat consistent with that.

Talk soon!

#datingmyself365 #consistentbaggagedrop120

MIA and technical difficulties

Well I am back, I thought it was longer but it has only been seven days, but seven days too long. After a week of medical issues with my teenager I had to take several more days to reset. I have been horrid over the past week, my food intake and excercise have been non existent sadly. Now I feel as though I am starting from scratch again, but really I am still spending more alone time with myself (and I need to get out more) and I have now been at this for 26 and 25 days.

Forward movement is the only way I know to go so last week is behind me and I am focusing on tomorrow is the universe grants me one. I am actually looking forward to the end of the first one hundred and twenty days, can’t wait to see the results and where I am going from there.

Next steps are to follow a strict gym/eating plan for thirty days and also I get to start yoga and a dance class this month. I’m still trying to fit that soca aerobics class in but just havent made it. Timing is truly everything and I can’t currently figure out if I am right on time or slightly off. I guess only time will tell, praying and fighting for the best though. As always visit my IG page for pics.

Talk soon

#datingmyself365 #consistentbaggagedrop120

It sometimes takes a village.

Thankful for my village, without whom I would probably have given it all up by now. I am so happy to say that I am now several days into week two, geesh has it only been two weeks? It feels like forever, lets just say is has been 19 days into my 365 day journey and 17 days into my 120 day consistent baggage drop. I seem to be having the time of my life even with all of the ups and downs and starts and stops.

The lessons I am learning is that you should always take time to laugh at yourself, life goes on, this too shall pass and if you are strong you can get through anything. I am still working on getting rid of the things I can live without in the house, (declutter central) I expect that Aminah will give me the biggest push back and my closet even bigger but I will do it.

I look forward to the end of this week and even more to the end of the first month. I am very close to having lost ten pounds so that means I have ten more to go and then twenty to tone. yayyy

Talk soon.

#datingmyself365 #consistentbaggagedrop120

Yesterday was a complete $uck it day, well at least close. When posting goes wrong!

Where do I start, Friday was an awesome day filled with many starts but no finishes. Although my angel did go to her last high school homecoming dance and looked amazing as usual.

Yesterday however takes the cake, the realization that I am mom, taxi, atm, cook, therapist, lover, friend, sister, and so many other things while still trying to maintain my fragile existence is overwhelming. I did however work out yesterday with Kellie the gm beast, she is simply amazing and has so much stamina. I think we were destined to be friends and I’m so grateful the universe finally threw us together.

As to my dating my self Friday or yesterday, I took my self to bed Friday and out to an arts panel with Kellie on Saturday and then the three of us had dinner. Kellie, Jha and I, loads of fun and laughter per usual. I had everything I wasnt supposed to food wise, I am still maintaining the no alcohol policy at least. I am alive and I goo two weeks in and managing pit falls and all. I will write another one of these today I feel I have been slacking lately, but maybe I wont. I still havent figured if these will be daily, weekly, or monthly checkins.

Talk soon

#datingmyself365 #consistentbaggagedrop120